I've had some great science teachers over the years, which is no doubt part of the reason why I eventually decided to pursue science as a career. But something Mr. Allan taught us in 9th grade stuck with me. He was one of those teachers who peppered his lectures with anecdotes, which usually meant he told the same few over and over again, and one of those popped into my head over the weekend. He liked to talk about Marilyn Monroe, about how beautiful she was and how much fame and wealth she had amassed despite her age. However, he emphasized that from a purely biological perspective, she was a complete failure because she never managed to bear children; she never passed on her genetic material. Biologically, the only purpose in life is to reproduce.
Studying biology all these years, I haven't encountered any concept truer than this. Every biological function has been thoroughly groomed through natural selection toward the achievement of one goal: survive long enough to reproduce. We see this over and over in nature: The salmon and turtles who travel thousands of miles just to deposit their eggs, the 17-year-cicadas who emerge just long enough to ravage our landscaping, get it on, and then drop dead.
We humans have tried to find greater meaning our lives than mere reproduction, but even now in the 21st century the only things we leave behind that survive for any significant length of time are our genes. The realization of this fact should then fill you with trepidation given the developments over this past weekend: the arrival of another Spears baby.
Yes, on Friday, Jamie Lynn Spears welcomed into the world another plastic bottle in the gene pool of humanity and named her Maddie. Cute name, but I worry about just how successful this family is becoming, biologically speaking. Already we have Maddie's two cousins, and while I'm sure they're fine children, I can't help but worry what future contributions to society may arise from the spawn of those who have already brought us Zoey 101, Crossroads, and Britney & Kevin: Chaotic.
In many ways, Britney is a modern day Marilyn. The fame, the fortune, the blonde hair. But through her children she accomplished something Marilyn never did. The irony is that, since then, Britney has been steadily losing all that she and Marilyn had in common. The head shaving, the crotch shots, the occasional trips to rehab. Why? Maybe Britney folded under the stress of adolescent fame. Maybe her actions are of her own free will. Or maybe she's genetically predisposed to making dumb decisions. Let's just hope that there won't be any repeat performances.
Studying biology all these years, I haven't encountered any concept truer than this. Every biological function has been thoroughly groomed through natural selection toward the achievement of one goal: survive long enough to reproduce. We see this over and over in nature: The salmon and turtles who travel thousands of miles just to deposit their eggs, the 17-year-cicadas who emerge just long enough to ravage our landscaping, get it on, and then drop dead.
We humans have tried to find greater meaning our lives than mere reproduction, but even now in the 21st century the only things we leave behind that survive for any significant length of time are our genes. The realization of this fact should then fill you with trepidation given the developments over this past weekend: the arrival of another Spears baby.
Yes, on Friday, Jamie Lynn Spears welcomed into the world another plastic bottle in the gene pool of humanity and named her Maddie. Cute name, but I worry about just how successful this family is becoming, biologically speaking. Already we have Maddie's two cousins, and while I'm sure they're fine children, I can't help but worry what future contributions to society may arise from the spawn of those who have already brought us Zoey 101, Crossroads, and Britney & Kevin: Chaotic.
In many ways, Britney is a modern day Marilyn. The fame, the fortune, the blonde hair. But through her children she accomplished something Marilyn never did. The irony is that, since then, Britney has been steadily losing all that she and Marilyn had in common. The head shaving, the crotch shots, the occasional trips to rehab. Why? Maybe Britney folded under the stress of adolescent fame. Maybe her actions are of her own free will. Or maybe she's genetically predisposed to making dumb decisions. Let's just hope that there won't be any repeat performances.
No comments:
Post a Comment